Geeking Out in Greece: Thermopylae

Impressively, King Leonidas was 60 years old when he died at Thermopylae. Life expectancy for Spartan men was only 34 years.

One of my favorite nerd spots in Greece was Thermopylae, historic site of the battle depicted in the graphic-but-awesome 2006 movie 300. It’s probably the most famous battle in Greek history, a tall tale of heroism against impossible odds.

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Picture this: it's 480 BC. The Empire of Persia is still pissed that it got its butt whooped by the soldiers of Athens 30 years before, in the Battle of Marathon. The new Persian leader, Xerxes, has spent the last 3 decades plotting his father’s revenge and amassing a huge army, intent on defeating Greece once and for all.

A paltry 7,000 Greek soldiers are sent to meet these Persians at Thermopylae. Their case is hopeless: Xerxes’ army is said to count 1 million warriors (although that number is disputed today - it was probably closer to 200,000). Included in those 7,000 Greeks are the famous 300 Spartan fighters, tough as nails. They are led by King Leonidas, an absolute beast of a man, whom us ladies will fondly remember as Gerard Butler in his leather loincloth.

*ahem*

Moving on.

The vastly outnumbered Greeks manage to hold off the Persians for a week, then the real battle begins. At one point, Xerxes commands Leonidas to give up his arms, to which he famously retorts, Come and get them (Molon labe) !

An artist’s rendering of the Pass of Thermopylae. Whether or not this was once accurate, the pass definitely does not look like this now.

For two days, the Spartan army plants itself at the mouth of the only road that the massive Persian army can take through the mountains. The Persian soldiers must break rank in order to squeeze through the bottleneck in the mountain pass. The Spartans, formidable fighters, can easily handle the now-decreased number of enemies coming at them. (Spartans famously devised a battle formation called a phalanx, in which rows of soldiers stood directly next to and over each other, with their shields overlapping to form an enormous barrier). Consequently, they lose very few men today while the Persians lose a great deal. King Xerxes is said to have been completely perplexed and dumbstruck, and considered a full retreat after 2 days of constant ass-whooping.

However, Day 3 brings the real kicker for the Spartans. A local resident named Ephialtes betrays them by leading the Persians around the mountains, allowing them to sneak up behind the Spartans. King Leonidas learns they have been betrayed, sends away most of the Greek army for safekeeping and stays behind to fight to his certain death, along with his 300 Spartans and 700 other Greeks called the Thespians.

(Not my photo) The narrow pass of Thermopylae now. Due to earthquakes, erosion and modern road-building, the ground is 65 meters higher than it was in 480 BC, making it much less dramatic.

In the ensuing chaos, King Leonidas is shot down by Persian archers, who rain down sheets of arrows until every last Greek is dead.

Xerxes goes on to conquer Athens, but is defeated 20 years later by the very soldiers that had been sent home by Leonidas at Thermopylae.

Spartans, and this battle in particular, have been elevated to mythical status throughout Greece. To this day, Thermopylae is the most famous last-stand in world history and is a symbol of courage and bravery against overwhelming odds.

The National Archeological Museum in Athens has a small section about the Battle of Thermopylae which I found cool. The smaller arrows at the top were the Spartans’ and the larger ones at the bottom were used by the Persians. These are the very arrowheads that killed the Spartans at Thermopylae.

Spartans were quite the tough bunch; each and every man was a warrior by law. One of the most extreme civilizations in Earth’s history, they stood out against their neighbors. For example, a Spartan specialty was black soup made from pig’s blood, vinegar and salt; no other civilization in Greece would drink it.

Literally bred for military excellence, Spartans were both idolized and feared by their fellow Greeks. Feeble or ill infants were left outside to die of exposure. At the age of seven, soldiers-in-training were stripped of all clothing except a single loincloth, and endured 13 years of brutality and frugality: heavy group initiations, extreme hunger, exposure to cold and heat, untreated infections and serious lack of sleep. They had to steal food to survive but were flogged if caught. They often didn’t survive the endurance contests and beatings they were regularly subjected to. Spartans had long, flowing hair which would only be cut off if a soldier showed weakness or cowardice.

Spartan women were fully educated and enjoyed considerably more superior rights than other women in the world at that time (or in this time, for that matter). They enjoyed freedoms that were unheard of in that time period. Their physical fitness and beauty was the stuff of legends. The mythical Helen of Troy, before she ran away with Paris and kicked off the Trojan War, was originally Helen of Sparta.

Fearing no other civilization and rarely defeated for centuries, the city of Sparta had no walls or defenses other than its own citizens. Even Alexander the Great didn't bother trying to conquer the Spartans.

If you’re planning to visit...

Thermopylae monument to King Leonidas and his 300 Spartans.

Thermopylae monument to the 700 Thespians whose role in the battle is often overshadowed by the Spartans (or by Hollywood). This is the significance of the broken wing.

The memorial and its surroundings are beautiful, but the site itself is rather, well... spartan (haha See what I did there?) There are very few plaques to chronicle the battle. The area looks nothing like the descriptions in historical texts (or in the movie); the ground between the mountain walls is roughly 65 meters higher now and the seashore has retreated a few kilometres away. Also, it’s a bit out of the way in Central Greece (about 20 km from the town of Lamia), so I recommend a package tour for both the guide and the transportation.

The battle site today, with a small path leading up to the famous pass. The Phocian Wall is the second, dark green, tree-covered middle wall.

I toured Thermopylae along with Ancient Delphi, which was a much more developed site and totally worth visiting as well. You can also round up your visit to the ancient city of Sparta, although there’s not much left of it now.

If you are so inclined, Odyssey-Ancient History Documentaries has a good documentary about King Leonidas, and Gnosis Documentary has a good one on the Spartans, hosted by the fabulous Bettany Hughes.

Happy travels, my friend.

Collection of photos Greece